Monday, April 07, 2008

Memorials and such

There has been some talk floating about the ether about physical memorials for Andee. Things like tree's or trash cans for Chacala been talked about. I have stayed out of these discussion for a couple of reasons. The first is that these are the kinds of things people need to do when they lose someone and I am not going to begrudge them this (although my silence may have done this and for that I am sorry.) When Andee and I talked about this sort of thing of the years she was down in Mexico my basic understanding was that for Andee that once she was gone that was it. I do not think that she could have ever brought herself to understand the good effect that she had on others so she would have been surprised as the reaction her death got from those that knew her.

All of that said here is why, while I am happy that people want to do things, I am not taking part in any of it. We are each of us memorials for Andee. She effected each of us for good or bad in many way and changed many of us. So we are each living memorials of Andee just as those that we effect will be memorials for us when we are gone, dead or just moved on to the next town or country.

So I try to add a little fearlessness in to my day. Trying things that would have hesitated at before for fear of embarrassment or danger. This summer if things go well I will go sailing out of sight of land and this scares me but I did not even blink when given the opportunity. Andee was riding a bus through Mexico when someone said "Hey you should go to Chacala" and look what happened with that. So my memorial is to be better at saying "Yes, why not" when something new comes up. Maybe it is not reaching out for something new but it is a step in that direction. I hope that any one reads that might try to find the something in themselves.

As to the June 14 event what I am things is some thing simple in the park or a back yard. A bit of a potluck (fruit salad is a must), some good Mexican Coke (the carbonated stuff in a bottle)
, some words from whom ever wants to say some (I do), and some interesting conversations and stories about Andee.

thanks for your time